LATEST UPDATES

UPDATED EDIT 20/06/2024 at 8pm

Clients cancellations mean that this Friday (21st) is now available all day. Saturday is available too but not Sunday.

WHAT THREE WORDS. If you are new to us and use what3words to navigate then we are at feed.ideas.strong 

ADULT FORUMS. It seems these are becoming a real problem for massage therapists, as a growing number of childish men with the intellect of a walnut are browsing these sites and joining in the discussions about massage therapists. We know of one massage therapist who has virtually given up altogether because she's so disillusioned by the manner in which she is discussed online, and the other day we had another female therapists phone us up for advice and moral support as she's sick to death of it too. 

I'm going to throw this reminder out there to anyone who goes on these sites.... we have been known to ban clients who we've caught gossiping about us on adult chat forums. Especially if you've been unkind or presented a false account. You may think you're anonymous with your false names, but we can work it out! We do our best to provide a fantastic and genuine experience, and we dont need gossiping about afterwards.

LATEST NEWSLETTER. I've copied our latest newsletter below. I'll keep it posted for a couple weeks on this page. If you wish to be added to our newsletter list just let us know. We aim to send one out every 2-3 monhts.

NEWSLETTER below...

This is an excerpt from a book called “Be a Free Range Human” by Marianne Cantwell.

Needs no intro; speaks for itself. It’s called The Beige Army.

 

"These people are a type you come across every day. There’s one in the office with you right now. They prefer tradition and routine to innovation and enthusiasm. They think your idea of a freer, more fulfilled life is a fantasy best quashed soon.

They are the BEIGE ARMY and they have more of an impact than you think.

They are the managers in the office who can’t see the bigger picture, preferring to nit-pick on the one percent of negativity. “Well done for completing that project that will change the world, but you didn’t fill in the third line of form 3B in triplicate.”

The beige army are staid, repressed and terrified of change. But that’s not why I have a problem with them. After all, it’s up to them how they live their lives. I have a problem because they want YOU to be that way too!

They wander round the office and your extended family reunions, judging anyone who does anything outside of their comfort zone.

Should you be so audacious as to do anything that challenges their beliefs, they say “Are you sure that’s wise?”

What they really mean is if you do that weird thing it is bound to fail and you will crash and burn and be a laughing stock. You will be miserable and harken back to the days when you were safe in this beige existence, where nothing changes… ever.

The truth is that the beige army are a bunch of scared and vocal of people. Their criticisms of others are a weapon against facing up to their feelings. They pretend so much to be doing the right thing they forget they are even pretending. Other people who are different to them are far too scary to contemplate.

Everything they say is a manifestation of their fear:

  • They question your worthiness.
  • They criticize without ever putting themselves on the line.
  • They make you feel small and naïve.

 

The beige army’s biggest weapon is its pretence that is represents everyone, but it doesn’t. They are terrified of getting any bright colours on their bland, beige uniform."

 

FACEBOOK GROUPS etc

Anyone on facebook? We find it pretty useless as a social tool, and don’t even get me started on it’s bloomin’ algorithms! But it can throw up some interesting information when it comes to what’s going on and what mutual interest groups there are.

If you’re broadly interested in what’s going on in our area regarding stuff that’s vaguely connected or in similar genres to what we do then it’s worth checking out “Alternative Cheshire”, “Tantra in the UK and Ireland”, “Pagan Events UK”, “Spiritual Events Liverpool Wirral”  

 

RECIPROCAL MASSAGE

Also called mutual massage and reverse massage. This is where clients ask if they can massage us too. Nowhere on our website do we mention this, but it does come up from time to time, so I thought a brief word about it might clarify things. If you simply wish to initiate reciprocal palm-on-skin contact with us then that may be verbally consented to during the massage. But if you wish to actually spend 10, 15, 20 minutes or more massaging us then that takes us into different territory for two reasons. Firstly, although it might seem at times like there’s not much to what we’re doing, we are trained and experienced in correct techniques, and those techniques are not as easy as we make them look. Just ask anyone who’s been on our massage workshop days. They are not just to make you feel nice, they are delivered in a way that’s safe to receive. Secondly, it’s not something that we openly advertise, so it’s entirely at our discretion whether we agree to this or not. So although we allow it for some people, we don’t necessarily allow it for everyone who asks. So if you ask you must be aware that there’s a chance that we give a rather awkward and embarrassing “no thanks”.

Which leads me on to…

MASSAGE WORKSHOP / Have-a-go-yourselves day

I wont repeat everything I’ve already said in previous newsletters regarding these days. If you are new to us, then check it out on our website. But we will make one minor alteration for the next six months or so. We have always said that these workshops are for couples only, and we’ve defined couples as “any two adults of any gender who know each other by way of marriage, partnership, relationship, friendship or casual acquaintance.” The change is that if you are a single then you can register your interest and we’ll make a note and see if we can match you up with someone else who wants to attend as a single. But first we will need to email you some questions so that we can match you up appropriately. It is worth mentioning from the outset, however, that in making this change we anticipate interest from males to outnumber interest from females. Although you will be working together with us, you will mostly be working ON us rather than on each other.

The most recent workshop day we did was on 11th May, and we were really happy with how it went. The couple came with their own particular and inquisitive reasons, and I’m glad to say we could help them out.

 

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LGB COUPLES

We occasionally get individual clients who are L,G or B, but it’s very rare for us to get a gay or lesbian couple booking in as a couple. For those who want to know more about what we can provide in the erotic arena then get in touch. In brief, Val and I are both straight. Val will massage males intimately and females conventionally, (ie not intimately). Bri will massage both females and males intimately.

If you’re a “T” or a “Q” then you can enquire and we’ll answer each enquiry on an individual level.

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SPIRITUALITY

Had an enquiry recently that prompted me to put something about spirituality in this newsletter. As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, clients come for different reasons, and some clients come as part of a broader exploration of spirituality and what is means to be human; how we can experience and interact with the world, including the sensual world, around us.

When I was growing up at home, my (very religious) parents imparted upon me one definition of “spiritual”. And it was teachings, characteristics, examples to follow, beliefs, prayers and anything else that was ordained or pertaining to the Jewish God Yahweh… Jehovah… you know, the “proper” God, lol. The “real” one… haha. Since ditching my faith in my twenties, I’ve been exposed to other people’s definitions too, especially amongst those who operate on the wider fringes of the holistic / complementary therapy community.

My own definition of spirituality is as broad as it gets. To me, if it ain’t of the physical realm then it’s of the spiritual realm. So this could include thoughts, emotions, attitudes, beliefs, instincts, hunches, love.

I’m reading a rather interesting book at the moment that includes looking at the connection and interaction between body and mind, and what we learn about ourselves and others through human physical connection. We don’t just discover ourselves by climbing the mountain and sitting alone in the lotus position at the top, we also discover ourselves in the context of our interactions and connections with others. What we like, what we don’t like, what turns us on, what turns us off, our feelings about change and new experiences, how we want to be touched, and don’t want to be touched. We learn what floats our boat, what bores us rigid, what stimulates and arouses, and what repels us. We can be slightly different depending on who we’re with, and what mood we’re in. Regarding affairs, one relationship therapist said that it’s not always that we are seeking someone else, sometimes we are seeking another self. In other words, we are seeking to find other hidden aspects of ourselves, our curiosities… we subconsciously ask ourselves “Who am I when I’m with you?”

So there are spiritual aspects of tantric massage too. It may be part of your wider journey too?

 

SOMATIC EMPATHY

“Somatic”… meaning to do with the body and the sensations within it. This is an area that interests us and we intend to look into it and pay it more attention. It’s a lengthy topic, so bare with me while I explain just the basics. Somatic empathy refers to a sort of understanding of the physical body of the person you are with, and this understanding is conveyed not by words but by bodily sensations or just a hunch that something isn’t right. Val has had several experiences when she’s politely suggested that clients get something checked out with a GP, only to find out later from her clients that her concerns had substance to them. This is despite Val not being a medic or having any tangible evidence. We’re currently looking into this phenomena, and I might say more about it in future newsletters. Some examples of somatic empathy are more commonplace and relatable. For example, if you see someone stub their toe you might cringe and move your foot as though it had actually happened to you. And which man hasn’t crossed his legs and winced when seeing a gymnast fall and crush their gonads, even though it never happened to them personally.

 

ONE THERAPIST, TWO CLIENTS

When couples book in for massage, Val does one and I do the other. But what if you’re a solo therapist? I’ve never had to think about this, but it was brought up in conversation with a fellow practitioner who anticipates taking on his first couple very shortly. How would one therapist massage two people simultaneously in the same session? I gave my thoughts (brief as they were) and it’s motivated me to make this offer. Partly for experience, partly out of curiosity, and partly because there may be some couples who wish to give it a go without incurring the expense of our usual couples massage. If any couple would like to try a couples massage with me, Bri, then it’ll be at 1-2-1 prices rather than couples prices. Please note, this service is not with Val (who has enough on her plate), it’s with Bri. Whilst I don’t anticipate a big response to this, there may be a couple who think “Yeah, let’s give it a go.” All enquiries made by text or email must be followed up by phone call by each member of the couple before a booking will be made. This is to avoid the inevitable armchair fantasists wasting my time with phoney enquiries and fake bookings. Unfortunately, it happens!

 

SUMMER APPOINTMENTS

It’s an unfortunate paradox that we burn electricity like mad in the winter to keep the cabin warm, but in summer it can get sweltering and we are forced to burn eleccy by using the fan!

Over the next three months, the times when the room temperature will be at it’s most comfortable are mornings and evenings. If it’s less than 21c/70f then afternoons will also be fine too. But if you are thinking of booking for an afternoon then check the forecast first and if it’s going to be, say, over 24c/75f then you might want to reconsider and choose a morning or evening instead. We’re not going to turn down business, so we’ll take afternoon bookings. But it’s worth being aware that it can get rather heated in that room on a hot summer’s day.

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COUNSELLING WEBSITE. Counselling services will continue as and when we get requests for them, but for the next 6-12 months we will not be actively marketing them due to our energies being needed in other areas of our family life. So it's a reduction, you might say, rather than stopping altogether. If anyone is interested in counselling (both individuals and couples) then please click on our website link here www.seagrass-wellbeing.co.uk for more details, and before the website disappears offline on 1st April.

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We are still suffering the frustration of having to turn down too many appointments for no other reason than clients are leaving it way too late to book. Many of whom are making a habit out of chancing it that we are available on a whim with little notice. Winging it "on the hoof" you might say. Ducking and diving under the radar of either the boss in work or the partner at home. If you struck lucky once, please don't assume that it'll happen again. Plan and book ahead. There's even some clients we would happily see again but we've literally turned them down a dozen or more consecutive times in a row because they just keep leaving it to the last minute. It gets a bit embarrassing after a while having to continually say "Sorry... no can do."   Plan ahead. 

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